Tuesday, November 14, 2006

My first mean anonymous comment



I know it's kind of sick to be excited about that, but that's me, SICK!

The comment was left on Friday but I didn't see it until last night and I was SOOOO excited!

Anonymous said...
Your an idiot. One yager bomb wouldn't make you pass out. Your obviously a slut and slept with some dude. Dont blame it on a delicious yager bomb.

8:58 PM

I've always found mean comments amusing when reading the popular blogs (the ones that actually have a big reading audience). I've always secretly wished to have someone hate what I've written or shared so much that they come to dislike me. I want to be judged by the Internet damn it! I want to feel special.

I think my problem has been though that I openly admit to doing stupid stuff, to being a drunk and a slut among other things. Which is obviously something the anonymous blogger wasn't aware of. You called me a slut? Yeah, I'm way ahead of you buddy. I pretty much do it in every post.

Do I really think I'm a slut outside of the Internet? No. Have I done slutty stuff before? Well, Yeah. Yes, I've had a one night stand, when I as 18, very drunk, and very stupid. I have never done it again, I learned my lesson and I would never do it again. Up until the night of that particular blog I had never kissed a random guy before and if you read the whole blog you can see that I clearly didn't sleep with him.

I made the guy sleep on the floor, while I took up his bed. Anonymous, Im also a bitch! You forgot that one. I was way more interested in comfortable sleeping than having sex with him. Do I think I was slutty that night? ABSOLUTELY. It's pretty slutty to kiss a random guy and then go home with him, even if you did nothing else but kiss.

Do I blame it on the Jager Bomb? Hell yeah I do! Do you know that Jager Bombs have Red Bull in them? Red Bull, it fucks me up. I can't drink Red Bull with out Jager. It hits me hard, makes my heart race, I feel like I'm having a heart attack. Mix Red Bull with Jager and you get a very fucked up Emma. I black out every time I drink Red Bull with any type of alcohol. Which is why I always refuse Red Bull and everything, ask Santi. I made him take two free Jager Bombs in a row once because I can't handle them, and once again ask Santi, I can drink. A lot. Like a man a lot.

The real question though is if I regret kissing that random boy and taking the Jager Bomb that night? Hell no I don't! That night was an absolute blast, well what I can actually remember of it.

So thank you Anonymous for making my day and in my eyes validating my blog. Really, you made me feel special. I just have two questions to ask you. Do you not have taste buds? Because Jager Bombs, YUCK. Sure they are delicious is you like to lick a rusted steel pole laced with cinnamon. My second question is, are you also not good at contractions? Let me help you not look like an idiot, because the only idiot around here is me.

You really should have written:

You're (you are) an idiot!

And my response simply would have been:

Dear Anonymous,
Yes! Yes, I am. Although Jager Bombs are disgusting and you should read more carefully cause I said I didn't sleep with the guy I randomly kissed. Oh and anonymous thanks for making my day! Feel free to point out the obvious any time you'd like.

Although being that it's NaBloPoMo time, I desperately needed material. So thanks once again, cause you saved my ass.

1 comment:

slopmaster said...

Typical girl. Always going for the jerks. If you wanted mean comments all you had to do was ask.