Dear Parents that I love so much,

Stop stealing my car! I know that you are also aware that I have no social life, but sometimes I make plans.

Sorry Snippy!

Remember when I was 16 and you'd hide the keys from me because I was in trouble? Yeah, remember? Well I'm going to start doing that to you guys. Only if I do I end up being the selfish, spoiled, brat anyway.

The only reason I'd ever have kids is so that for once I could always be right.