Why can't I just get it?

My Mother informed me last night that my Grandma got really sick on saturday. She was pretty close to death, that's a big shock. My Grandmas is pretty young and very strong for her age, and well none of us saw this coming. You'd think by now it would sink in that life is unpredictable. So much has happened to our family the past 4 years, things that you can't even imagine. Things that only happen to other people, things that even when the situation slaps you right in the face, you just can't believe it. Im happy to report that my Grandma is doing a lot better now, God is so good, and the prayers she received really helped. So far all her tests have come back with nothing abnormal and they're waiting for one more. Yesterday, I was on a big high because of my weight loss but I felt really lonely, sad and scared last night. I wasn't motivated to go out for a jog and I ate way more than I should have. Im not going to do that today, because in the end this behavior only hurts me. Of course today is a new day and Im going to do things right, I plan on going on that jog and maybe adding an extra mile to it. Im excited about spending some time with my brothers tomorrow, we're going to Schlitterbahn. I haven't been there in a long time and it's always a blast. Plus, hopefully I'll get some color, I'm getting white, its kind of scary.